A moment of pause
Querida Amiga,
Believe it or not, I follow my own coaching advice and strategies. Last week I had a moment where I had to lean into what I often recommend. A pause.
Someone had been flaky about a commitment they made to me. I had planned to remove them from the situation, move on, and take care of business myself. I had a short and straight-to-the-point email written out in my head and I was ready to send it.
I sat down at my desk, decided to open up Spotify, and put a playlist on before I got to work. When I opened the app the first thing that popped up was a song with a video playing. The video was a monarch butterfly flapping its wings.
You know monarchs are my sign. I knew at that moment it was a sign to pause. The song connected to the video was a 5-minute sound bath. I put my phone down listened for the 5 minutes and took long deep breaths as I sat there.
With each breath, I explored what was happening in my body. Was I comfortable with the response I was about to make? Slowly a new response started to emerge from within me.
In the span of 5 minutes I was able to release a learned response, that is rooted in fear and ego, and transition to a softer response that was connected with who I am consciously evolving to become.
So many life experiences have taught me to be self-sufficient and not to depend on others. When I do, and someone doesn’t come through, I immediately feel a confirmation that people let me down. The disappointment of the confirmation leads me to want to immediately detach from that person.
Consciously evolving means taking pauses to pivot automatic behaviors to the new behaviors we seek to learn. Right now I am exploring what it means to be softer. The pause I gave myself last week, was a conscious choice to continue retraining myself.
I no longer have to be younger Michelle who feels let down by others. I am now grown-up Michelle who has thoughtfully built communities of people who want to see me fully and engage with me in ways that lift me up and not keep me small.
To be honest, if I hadn’t seen that monarch I would’ve sent what I originally had in mind. I am not where I want to be. At that moment, I took a step that brings me closer to a new immediate response.
These shifts in who we are take time. That’s okay. Moving forward is part of healing. We are no longer allowing ourselves to be stuck. One step at a time with lots of grace along the way. We got this!
Quiero saber de ti. What are some learned patterns of behavior you are wanting to shift? What will help you to know to take a pause and check-in with yourself?
Un Abrazo,
Michelle
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